Dear Michelle,

I don't understand how you can speak of 'missed opportunities'.  I lost my wife, my daughter, and my home in the space of minutes, got charged with a bogus charge that will cost me thousands of dollars, and forced me to give up the best place I've lived in for years.  You took away my future, the one stable base I had been able to get after all the hard work I put in, as well as the opportunity to watch my daughter grow, and you're complaining about the camera?  That doesn't strike you as just a tad selfish?  I haven't been able to sleep right since you left.  I wake up every single day now in a panic attack.  Every.  Single. Day.  I cry in the car to and from work, every day, and break out into tears at random places and times.  I can't go anywhere, because I may just break down.
All because you wanted to have multiple relationships?  Because you blame the one man who has gone farther to show you his love than anyone?
You've hurt me for years, thrown my love back in my face, after making that beautiful child with you.  What the hell did I ever do to deserve this?
Why?  For all the supposed things I did, I was never cruel to you.  Every time I tried to work something out, or get to the bottom of a situation, you would run away.  The whole 'scared of you' schtick is just pure bullshit.  The very idea that I would hurt you or Savannah, the two most important, precious things in my life, that I busted my ass to take care of every day, is just ludicrous. You deny me every single thing I built my life around, and you complain about the fact that you forgot a camera?
I mean that little to you?  I ask, because you mean everything to me.  Our lives were simple, and I did everything to give what you said you wanted, our own place and a simple happy life.  And this is what I got for all that effort. 
Whenever it was just us, you seemed to be happier - but get online and there's no end to the asshats that will badmouth our relationship for their own agendas (Oh, but they're your 'friends', they couldn't possibly blah blah blah), and then the cycle starts anew.
You put so much energy into cheating, into lying, into destroying my world, and all I wanted was to make you two happy.  It's breaking my heart, Michelle.  I don't deserve this. Savannah doesn't deserve it either.  If you had put even a tenth of the effort into building our relationship, rather than breaking it, we could have been better off financially, and had a much happier time of our lives.  I never wanted any of this - all I ever wanted to do was spend my days with you and our little girl, and I can't even write this without breaking down in tears.
So, maybe you should think about that a bit.  How much I've lost..how much I've given just to have the privilege of waking up next to you, of being able to come home and have my daughter take my hand and want to play.  Think of all the heartache I've had to suffer, knowing the woman I treasure above everything wants to treat me like some dog turd lying in the road.  There are no words for the suffering I've been made to endure.  And after everything, I still do what I can, give you money and clothes for Savannah, and I don't even get a thank you? 
Something is wrong with your heart if all you feel for me is resentment and hatred.  I never got aggravated without a solid reason, and all I ever wanted, was a tiny bit of effort.  Did I just ignore the effort you put in on the meals you made me?  No.  I raved about them, because I truly appreciated the thought and time and effort you put in, something I rarely ever got credit for.
We should be taking pictures of our daughter together.  We should be enjoying our time together as a family.  Everything that has happened, has happened as a result of your actions, not mine.  I never cheated, never lied, never complained to anyone about our relationship.  I did everything I could think of to make things better, and all I got were more and more reasons why things were 'bad'.  I want to take pictures with you.  I want to take pictures OF you.  I want to see that look in your eyes like you had when you took a picture of yourself with that post-it note that said 'I love you Michael' on it.  I can't even think of that now without crying harder.
I wish you could see inside my heart.  I wish you could see how I truly am, and not the image you have built in your own mind to justify what has happened.  I wish I was worth something to you.  While you are lamenting not having a camera, I feel like I'm dying inside. slowly, inch by inch. I've been deprived of every single thing I worked for, everything I wanted, everything I loved.
Everything.
But it's not too late.  You could change everything.  There would be no questions, no recriminations, no blame.  If you could just get past your own past, and give me the chance to make you both happy, then things could be better - would be better. If you would just admit to yourself that I'm just a man who loves you, and who felt the natural frustration of working so hard in so many ways to make you happy and being slapped down for it. If you would ever work with me, rather than against me, if you treated me like I treated you, than we could have a really nice life together.  It's all I ever wanted, and if you just wanted it like I do, then there is no limit to what we could accomplish together.  I don't have any expectations writing this - I don't think anyone can change your viewpoint except you.  I only know it isn't true - I write the truth, and can look you in the eyes and say the same - I love you, and don't want to live in the past. I want us all to have a good future together.
All I do is miss you both - every second of every day.  It never goes away, never lessens in the slightest - it only grows.
You have the power to make it all better.  You can give Savannah her Daddy back, and together, we could watch her grow and share every moment of her life, make them as special as she deserves.
I've been through so much with you - I can only hope you won't give up on us completely.  I know we could have as much fun, and be as happy, as we were in the early days.  All you have to do, is want it.
You know where I am.  You know how to reach me.  You know how I feel, and I promise that were you to decide for us to be a family again, that I would not resent you in any way, or make you feel any guilt.  I just want us to be a family. 

Forever, Your Michael 



